Hurt.

I'm really in a pinch here. It is so hard for me to forgive and forget when I've done it so many times. I feel like the last time i was quite clear what my boundaries were. Not sure why anyone would think that they have changed? It isn't that hard of a concept to grasp. I think more than anything i am so hurt. Of all the people to do this to me why you? Of all the people i thought i could maybe trust or get advice from i thought it would be you? I mean i know how you can be; i guess i just thought it would be different. That was my mistake entirely. My question now is where do i go from here? Will i always feel so hurt? How the hell do i ever trust you again? I guess i just don't understand why. What about anything you did seems like it would have been a good idea? Especially to your own blood? My heart is honestly broken. Then for you to act like i am blaming you or hate you for what ME, MYSELF, AND I did to my own life. Let me be very clear,  i do not hate you or blame you for anything. Like i said before i am hurt more than anything. What i do in my life and the decisions i make have nothing to do with you. I am 21 years old and i don't need your permission nor your discipline. It was not your responsibility to do what you did to me. I can understand if you felt like it was wrong, you didn't like it, and especially won't condone it. That's all you had to say to me and it should have stayed at that. I already told you my plans and what i was doing in order to make it better. You ignored all of it and took what you wanted from it. You even decided to throw in some more stuff that isn't true and you damn well know it. Never in my life have you treated me this way and that's saying something. I have never been so hurt. The best part about it is you really think you haven't done anything wrong. What the actual fuck? I do not understand one bit. At this point i am lost as to what to do. I need some space that is for sure. End of freakin' story.